tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12669407.post8559832429193238645..comments2023-10-11T06:59:04.809-04:00Comments on shards of light: expectationssusannehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10407083772810629764noreply@blogger.comBlogger4125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12669407.post-31710487320557894982011-03-10T18:04:54.399-05:002011-03-10T18:04:54.399-05:00I just loved "old ladies of great faith!"...I just loved "old ladies of great faith!" I'm getting old, and I hope someday I, too, have great faith, and the courage to share it with younger women and be a mentor. I'm so proud of all these young "ladies of great faith" who have chosen NOT to follow a lost and shallow world and to see where their gratitude and thanks lie. Thank you for your post today and your list! It's such a blessing to me!Cora from Hidden Richeshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11066244776488896258noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12669407.post-68207202618076303372011-03-03T15:54:52.421-05:002011-03-03T15:54:52.421-05:00This is such a heartfelt, profound post, Suzi.
&...This is such a heartfelt, profound post, Suzi. <br /><br />"those times when it almost seems like I am fighting God to try to get my heart's desire, Him being the proverbial bad guy, one hand holding my dreams away, the other hand holding my head at a arms length as my own arms flair to reach what is not rightfully mine?<br /><br />Wow…well said. I can relate. Those times when I've tried to reach out for what isn't mine (or isn't mine yet in His timing) have been less than enjoyable. The perspective that God is somehow holding out on us, is so wrong. I've come to realize that He has reasons for what He does and I may or may not be given understanding. The reality is that God is good, regardless of what I think I should or shouldn't have in my life. He really is for us, wanting what's best for us - His best. I've learned (through some times of pain) that waiting for His best really is best, and a lot less painful. There may be pain in the waiting, but it doesn’t compare to the pain of believing an untruth about the God who loves me, who sacrificed everything for me. There’s a difference between having the expectation of love from God and demanding whatever we want, when we want it. <br /><br />As for expectations with other people, I agree. I think we need to meet people where they are, honestly and with grace. I’m no expert, but I’ve learned after 16 + years of marriage that the times I’ve had hard and fast expectations are the times I’m most disappointed. Clear communication is essential to maintaining relationship. We simply can’t read each other’s minds (even if as a woman, I hope that my husband knows me well enough that he’d just know what I’m thinking or need). It’s unfair to him to expect him to just know. <br /><br />I think the key in relationships is to be other centered. When we focus on ourselves, we’re self-centered, requiring or demanding from others our spoken or unspoken expectations. Jesus’ example is one of love and self sacrifice; sacrificing desires or expectations to meet others needs. Bottom line, as followers of Christ, we should be of the mind that people don’t exist to serve us. We shouldn’t approach others with the expectation that they should. Rather, we should be looking for ways to show His grace. <br /><br />Great post, my friend. Really enjoyed reading it. <br /><br />-AngieAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12669407.post-46491850522451865252011-03-03T15:10:41.664-05:002011-03-03T15:10:41.664-05:00Val...
agreed that there should be a level of exp...Val...<br /><br />agreed that there should be a level of expectation within the human race, and especially the family of God. but perhaps i see these basics as less expectations, and more the foundation of relationships. i would never say to a new friend, "this is what i expect of you..." the word 'expect' carries a lack of relationship with it. as you get to know someone more and more, you come to know what is important to them, and the way you interact takes shape around the individuals.<br /><br />when i turn the key in the ignition, i expect the car to start. when i put my bank card in the ATM, i expect to be able to access the funds there. when i dial the telephone, i expect it will begin ringing at the other end of where i've dialed. but i have a relationship with none of these things. they are inanimate objects that serve a specific purpose. the same cannot be said of humans.<br /><br />when i run into a friend, i don't expect them to smile and chat with me, but i am hopeful that they will. to expect them to do what i want them to do holds them captive to my expecations, without me knowing the whole story of what is going on in their life at that moment. expectations are one-sided and i truly believe that they crowd and choke relationships. depending upon what is going on in someone's life, perhaps a smile and nod is the best they can do in that moment. for me to walk away wounded because i expected more is my issue.<br /><br />not to mention that my expectations for someone and their own—and God's—expectations for themselves may be complete opposites!<br /><br />the same with my relationship with God. yes, had has promised us things, and i know that he loves me, but His gifts will not look the same in my life as they do in yours, or anyone else's. Hebrews chapter 11 is an excellent reminder that all God's children are not treated the same way. the moment i start expecting God to do what i want him to, give me what i want, and feel entitled to the gifts he gives, then my expectations have lead me astray.<br /><br />as for God's expectations of me, i am eternally grateful for His word, and that i only need study it to discover how He would have me live.susannehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10407083772810629764noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12669407.post-70135682322227401592011-03-03T14:18:32.541-05:002011-03-03T14:18:32.541-05:00I have to humbly disagree with you on this one.
I...I have to humbly disagree with you on this one.<br /><br />I believe expectations are never really the culprit in our failed relationships with people. Rather, it's that we are poor communicators and neither party is ever quite sure what the other expects. Expectations are important because it keeps us accountable to one another, and pushes us to be better. Work relationships with our employers often breakdown due to failure to set clear expectations. We let our partners down when we fail to let them know what we expect when we say things like "I'm ok with whatever you want" when we don't really mean that at all.<br /><br />It's when we fail to live up to those expectations that we see clearly the tenacity of the relationship. Genuine relationships endure despite unmet expectations. Acceptance and forgiveness of each others' failures are evidence of substance in our relationships. A world with no expectations is one of apathy and disinterest.<br /><br />I think it's important for us to expect something from God too. After all, He promised us justice, mercy, grace, love, provenance. Children expect their parents to love, nurture, teach, and help them grow. In the same way, I agree we can adopt that child-like attitude of trusting and expecting that God will be all those things for us. Perhaps we're stuck on what those things look like, and that's when we get disappointed. If provenance doesn't take the form of a promotion, we feel let down. Or we put up blinders to His love when we don't receive healing. We mistake punishment for justice. <br /><br />I'd like to think He expects great things from me too :)Valerienoreply@blogger.com