time

a couple weeks ago i mentioned a new book i was beginning.

back then, i had no idea what a can of worms this book would open up for me.

it all seemed simple enough. The Divine Hours is a book of prayers meant to be prayed at certain times throughout the day. morning {between 6 and 9 am}, mid-day {between 11 am and 2 pm}, vespers {between 5 and 8 pm} and compline {before retiring for the day}.

easy enough, right?

and for the most part it is. i enjoy getting up in the morning and beginning my day a bit more formally. not to mention, the compline prayers are truly a beautiful way to end the day.

the problem is what lies between these two.

at work, i set a reminder for myself at 10:55 am, so that five minutes before 11 am, i would be ready. this reminder goes off every day, monday to friday. for the first day or two, the whole process was new enough, that when it went off, i excitedly would go over to Kindle for Mac, to get ready.

the problem came on the third day.

at 10:55 am this morning, when the alarm went off, i felt a flash of annoyance. it was a crazy morning, and to be honest, i really didn't have time for anything else. so i reset the reminder to 12:30 pm, thinking that the extra hour and a half would get me to a better place.

not so much. i ended up postponing it so many times, i missed the window.

i wish i could say that this was the only day that it happened, but sadly, it is not.

the thing that has surprised me most about this exercise isn't a pretty look into my soul. the thing that has most taken me off guard is the fact that i see this reminder as an intrusion. somehow this reminder to pray, to converse with my God and Savior, has been demoted to an invasion of my time.

like i said, not a pretty look into my soul.

my time.

this has led me to think about all the ways that we talk about time.

we spend time.
waste it.
one can use time wisely.
or save time.

then it hit me. we use the same verbs to talk about time as we do when we talk about money. the Bible is pretty clear that our money is not our own, but rather a gift from God that we are stewards of.

much like our time on this earth.

somehow, even though i know that my life belongs to God, i have begun thinking that it really is mine, to spend and use however i want. but alas, it is not.

so i am grateful to this book, and the lesson it has already begun to teach me.

i am sure, however, that it won't be the last...

creativity

while i haven't yet read Elizabeth Gilbert's Eat, Pray, Love, it is on my list of books i most definitely want to crack open. but tonight, i happened upon this TED talk that she did, that has hit me squarely between the eyes.

too often my own creative process is wrought by fear and negativity. the nagging question over whether i will ever have a remotely brilliant or creative idea again {or if i every truly have had one!} haunts me far too often.

Ms. Gilbert, with her dry wit, it seems has faced down these very same demons...

rest

“Sometimes the most urgent thing you can possibly do is take a complete rest.” —Ashleigh Brilliant

yesterday, after a three and a half hour nap, i woke up with a sore throat. this morning, the sore throat has been joined by other cold-like symptoms. i can feel in my throat that i am once again on the verge of losing my voice.

this time, i am going to try something different. instead of pushing myself and thinking that i am all so invincible, and if i can just keep going, i will work through it, then ending up with laryngeal-tracheal bronchitis {as has happened twice in the last year}, i will rest today, and with the help of Advil C&S, tea and sleep, tomorrow will be a much brighter day.

let's see if this plan works better than the other one...