10.26.2005

indulgence

reading: every book on paris in my possession
listening: les miserables soundtrack

although i've decided that i want to spend my 40th birthday in paris, now that it's come to the time for me to book the flight, i'm faltering.

it's a lot of money to spend entirely on oneself. and this is just the flight. it just seems like there are so many things in the world that could be better served by all this money than spending ten days in paris, even though its been my dream for as long as i can remember.

i just need to do it. tonight, laura said that i work hard, and i just need to do this for myself.

why do i have to make everything so incredibly difficult?

"To live in the presence of great truths and eternal laws, to be led by permanent ideals - that is what keeps a man patient when the world ignores him, and calm and unspoiled when the world praises him."
-- Honore De Balzac

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