illusionist

i like to be in control. i like to know what is going on, how it affects me, what i can do about it, all with the ability to opt out, should it be in my best interest. realizing that in this life, there are few things that are actually within the span of my authority, there are days when i prefer the security blanket of the illusion of control over cold reality.

i like to be in control.

contrast this with Jesus' words in john 15:13,

no one has greater love [no one has shown stronger affection] than to lay down (give up) his own life for his friends. {amplified}

love = give up my life

give up= lose control

there are days when my cultural mindset of entitlement wants to say, 'are you kidding me? there has to be another way!' then i read in today's MUFHH that 'salvation is easy for us, because it cost God so much.' then wonder why would, i even for a moment, believe that this path of being a Christ follower would be easy, and that i would only be asked to do the happy, easy, daisy-strewn things of life, while still playing by my own rules?

give up my life or maintain the illusion of control.

one makes me a disciple, the other, an illusionist.