an anniversary

it seems that the loudest voices
are the ones calling
        to hate
        to destroy
        to burn
        to judge
        to hurt
        to retaliate.

if i listen only to these clamoring voices,
the ones i cannot miss
then i am tempted
        to believe that hate is the only way
        to deal with those who are different
        to handle those who disagree
        to protect myself from the unknown.

it seems simple enough
but that's because it's easy.

and this road i've chosen
if i truly believe in His promo,
was never intended to be easy.

separating myself
from the commotion
and listening to His voice,
both still and small
i find another way.

    love your enemies.
   give blessings to those who curse you.
   if someone takes something, give them more than they ask for.
   don't slap back, but offer the other cheek.

none of these things make sense
in the mentality of the loud voices

they only make sense
   of a God—
   turned carpenter—
   turned teacher—
   turned Savior.

* * * * *

long before this day became the anniversary of terrorist attacks, this day was a special one in my family. it was my Gram's birthday, then some 20 years later, it became her and my Gramp's anniversary. so long before it was a day marked by death and devastation, it was a day of life and celebration of love.

even though i still miss my Gram, more than i could have ever imagined after 15 years, i cannot help but be glad that she wasn't here in 2001, when her birthday became something entirely else. and i'm especially glad that she's not here this year, with all the hate sentiment flying around, especially from those who claim to follow her Jesus. she would not have liked it one bit… because my Gram was a woman who knew how to love. it wasn't always easy for her, but because she daily sat at the feet of her Creator, she learned how to love, and she practiced what the learned on our family, and on those whose lives she touched along the way.

i've not yet learned to love as well as she had. i'm still far too selfish, too often need to get my own way, and i really like being right.

but i'm slowly learning.


bellaverita said...

Perfectly beautiful, Suzi. It really doesn't make sense to a reactionary world where hitting first is the norm, but makes perfect sense in light of our God, who sacrificed all in the greatest act of love. I love this:

"separating myself
from the commotion
and listening to His voice,
both still and small
i find another way."

Called to forgive, called to love, even when it hurts. It's the only way. Thanks for this, Suzi.


D J Futers said...

Great blog Suzi...but surprising. I might have been expecting something that wasn't there.

suzi said...

@angie— thank you, my friend, for your kind words.

@djfuters— thank you, Jeff... and yes, given all the notes i made this week, i was surprised by where it went myself!

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