making peace

i read a quote yesterday that keeps haunting me.
until you make peace with who you are, you'll never be content with what you have.
~Doris Mortman
for a girl with contentment issues, these are the kinds of words that can cause hours of introspection. and not necessarily the good kind...

there are many days when i feel as though i am at peace with who i am. the self esteem issues that were my constant companion in my teens and early 20s seem to have evaporated. i am comfortable in my skin.

but then there are the other days. the days when i cannot seem to find my way out of bed in the morning. days when words seem more like sticks and stones than things that cannot hurt me. when all creative and original thought seems to be sucked into some great black hole, never to be brought to life. when every insecurity i have seems to be stuck to me like a post-it note for the world to mock.

on those days, i will admit, i tend not to be at peace with myself.

could this be the root of my discontentment?


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