123 days

In the last 123 days: my uncle passed away, parents stayed with me when they came down for the funeral, the day they got home my nephew Jayden got sick, his constipation turned out to be cancer, spinal surgery, what was thought to be a 'good' cancer turned out to be a 'bad' one, Jay got to come home just before Christmas {in a cool orange wheelchair}, our family had a very surreal Christmas Day, chemotherapy, trips to Disneyworld, more chemotherapy, Dad went to Guatemala to build houses, more chemotherapy, one of my brothers had surgery, another family member had some medical challenges, then day before yesterday, we found out yet another member of my family is now having her own set of medical challenges.

Are. You. Kidding. Me.

Living on the other side of the country from where most of this is happening, I have spent many of the last 123 days feeling frustrated that I am not there, wanting to help, but knowing there is really nothing I can do from here. Many phone calls that came my way ended with me in tears, the product of distance and disappointment. With the exception of the 25 days that I was with my family, each of these days I have keenly felt the geographical separation.

But yesterday was different.

While out with some friends at lunch, my phone rang. It was my brother Doug…

…calling to tell me that Jayden's oncologist informed them to say that many of the tumors they found on December 3 were gone, only two were left, and even they were smaller.

Good news.

Finally, good great news.

Over these last few days, the thing that has been haunting the playground of my mind is the unchanging, constant character of God. The Bible says that He is the beginning and the end. That His steadfast love never changes. That He is the same yesterday, today and forever.

He is the same God today that He was 124 days ago.

And as we waited for the results of the tests from last week, I could feel God impressing upon me over and over again, that no matter what the results were, no matter what happens, He has not changed. None of this has been a surprise to Him. He didn't go on vacation 123 days ago, or stop caring, or anything other human attribute that I might try to pin on Him.

He is still the same.

Even when it feels like the world is falling apart.

He is still the same.

Good news doesn't change His character. Neither does the bad.

He is still God, and He is still the same.

He is still love...

…and my heart is overflowing with gratitude for this simple grace.